So, I got home this afternoon to find a couple of guys standing in the neighbor's driveway, and saw a bunch of chairs and decorations in the back yard. I think it was literally the first time I ever saw it open.
I put my groceries away, and then wandered on over to ask what was going on, were they having a wedding? Yup. Now, at that point I fully expected that he was going to say tomorrow, possibly Sunday, You know, not right away since they just poured cement in the yard less than 24 hours ago.
He said 6:30 tonight. What?! That's like 3 hours from now!
The bride was going to be entering up the driveway and into the back yard.
Well of course I asked if they needed me to move my car. Not that my car isn't great and all, but I don't know that anyone wants to be looking at it on their wedding day. No, they said I could leave it there. I told them they could park people behind me if they needed to. Our street gets crowded pretty fast, and there is still all of the equipment from the yard work parked in places. I dragged my garbage cans around the corner, out of sight.
It's gets closer to wedding time, and it is really quiet next door. Finally some music kicked on and people started showing up!
I could totally overhear conversation next door while still in my house, since the windows are open.
--They can't put out enough chairs, and at least 7 people will have to stand. (Really? How bad could the backyard have been that you needed to pour cement? I'm guessing it isn't dry and that is why you can't put out all of the chairs.)
--something about the water in the pool being too cold. (WTF are they swimming at this thing? What else could the water be too cold for?)
At some point a dog got involved. I didn't see it arrive, and to the best of my knowledge my neighbor doesn't have one. It barked a little bit when more people started arriving, and people were making jokes about how it thought everyone was there just to play ball. It really didn't bark much at all.
Eventually some smooth and mellow music kicked on, and I was getting excited to try and see the bride. I wasn't even sure who was getting married. Wasn't my neighbor -- can't divorce anyone fast enough to make that possible.
6:30 comes and goes. Hardly anyone is there, the bride is nowhere to be seen. Cover story to hide the fact that there are bodies under the cement? Still possible! What if we have a runaway bride?
Minister arrives. Well I'll be -- maybe there really is going to be a wedding. Around 7pm a bunch of people all start showing up. Switched to more party tunes than smooth and mellow.
7:15 wedding began! Bride looked lovely, but I still have no idea who she is. 7:30 wedding is over! Holy quickness, Batman!
That was literally it. All done. No stopping for pictures afterward. They all left to go somewhere else for the reception. They locked up the yard too, so I couldn't even see what the pool was too cold to do.
Maybe they didn't want to have a reception there with bodies under the cement. I'm just saying. Still totally possible! Why else would you pour cement in the back yard, and why bother for a wedding that only lasted 15 minutes? You could have strewn flower petals on the ground to disguise whatever the problem was for a lot less money and more romance.