Don't Be Creepy

Hey, Friends.

So, this is gonna take a bit of time. Pour yourself a glass of wine, grab a beer -- maybe get yourself a cup of coffee. Pick the beverage of your choice and snuggle in.

I wasn't sure I was going to write about this, and I'm still not entirely sure I'm going to post it or share it for people to read. Clearly I need to get it out of my system since I'm still thinking about it. There's a situation going on that's kind of creeping me out, and I'm trying to sort out whether I'm justified in being a little freaked or if I'm just overreacting. It also has to do with work, so I'm hoping this doesn't cause me any problems there if I do decide to share it.

There's a patron who comes to the library. We shall refer to him here as Truck Man. He's come to the library on and off for quite a while, but it's only recently that his behavior has gotten a little strange.

It started a month or so ago. Truck Man was sitting in his truck in the parking lot at work, back in the area where the staff usually parks, for an extended period of time. I was leaving -- I don't remember now if it was the end of the day or lunch break -- and he made a point of saying hello and telling me he was just on the phone, trying to take care of something. I didn't think anything of it. People chill in the parking lot all of the time. We have wifi, and there's an Optimum hot spot close by, so it really isn't odd to find people lingering in the parking lot at all hours of the day.

Soon other people started to notice that he was spending a lot of time hanging out in the parking lot. We all kind of assumed he was just using the wifi or something, but it was kind of weird that he'd rather sit outside in his truck than be in the library in the air conditioning when we were open.

He did still come in to the library to check out and return dvds. He just really seemed to enjoy hanging out in our parking lot -- it might be in the afternoon, in the evening. He was there a lot is my point.

Not too long ago a coworker came to me and told me she felt uncomfortable going to her car. She had been leaving for her dinner break, and Truck Man had been parked right next to her car. He didn't say anything to her, but she said he definitely wasn't on his phone. He was just watching everything that was going on. I told her to park next to the library from now on, and I'd report it.

Technically, he isn't doing anything wrong. It's a public library. There's wifi out there. He isn't harassing people or even saying anything to people. It's just a little disconcerting that he sits out there for hours, watching people come and go. Or whatever it is he is doing.

Last week, as I learned after the fact, Truck Guy was there in the afternoon. A male coworker went out and watched him during his lunch break. Truck Guy wasn't on the phone making calls, or using the wifi. He just sits there, watching everyone coming and going. Still, not really doing anything wrong, but it's a bit odd. I like people watching, but I don't choose to sit in parking lots for hours on end, several days a week, doing it.

Now we get to last night.

Truck Guy had been in, about 15 minutes or so before closing. He checked out a bunch of dvds. I hadn't seen his truck lingering in the parking lot, so I assumed he had just popped in and then had gone about his business elsewhere since we were closing.

My coworkers and I closed the library as we normally do on Thursday night. It was a little after 9 pm, and it's dark out at 9 pm in mid August. I had noticed a car parked in the driveway in front of the building, where there is no parking, so I told my coworkers I was going to drive out that exit and see if there was a problem. I'm the "person in charge" so I wanted to make sure it wasn't someone with car trouble or the like. There's nothing else out near the library that would be open at that hour, and I didn't want to strand someone if they needed a phone to call for a ride or a tow truck.

I pull around to the front, and there is Truck Guy in his truck, parked in a spot near the front of the building. As I pull past him he turns on his truck. Whatever. I drive past the car in front of the building. It's someone who was in the library most of the night, and she is clearly still trying to use the wifi. Wonderful, excellent. I'm happy there isn't a problem and just want to go home.

As I'm pulling out of the driveway, I see that Truck Guy is also leaving, although leaving a bit of distance between our vehicles. There are no street lights on the main road by the library. We are out in East Bumblefuck.  It's really easy to notice other vehicles because their headlights are the only source of light on the street.

I notice that Truck Guy pulls out onto the road the same way I'm going. He only had 2 choices of directions, so not really surprising we are headed the same way.

Now, this is where I totally forgive you if you think I am overly paranoid, Friends. I've been having that debate internally for the last 24 hours or so. I may very well be. Maybe I've watched too many crime dramas on television and it's clouding my judgement.

So I'm driving and Truck Guy is behind me. But he's not right behind me like normal traffic, or being an ass and riding my bumper like people tend to do in these parts.  He's hanging several car lengths back, and all I can think is, "This is how all the cops on tv follow suspects when they are trying to blend in".

We get to the next intersection, and again he turns the same way I do. I'm still thinking maybe I'm just paranoid. He stays a ways back, not even doing the speed limit.

Red light at the next intersection. Now, I normally am very anti-using-a-phone-while-driving, but I decide that I need to put on Spotify and listen to something to calm myself down. I've half convinced myself at this point that I'm completely overreacting to something that is just a dumb coincidence. I don't even bother to see what song is going to play, I just want some music to make it seem like everything is perfectly fine and a normal Thursday night. The music starts and this is good, I love this song. Pull Me Deep, Logan, and distract me from being a paranoid freak.

He turns the same way the next intersection when the light turns green. And follows through the next two, still at a distance.

It was at this point I decided there was no way in hell I was going straight home. Maybe it's a coincidence, maybe he's really being a creepy stalker. He for sure does NOT need to know where I live. Not even the street. So I turn on to a busy side street, full of people and restaurants, and find a spot to park on the side of the road.  If he turns down this street, then I'm driving straight to the police station and we'll see if he follows me there.

Thankfully, blessedly, he didn't turn. I didn't realize exactly how tense I had been until that moment. I literally just sat there in my car while the rest of the song played, and then I headed home.

And it kept bugging me all night.

Was I just being overly paranoid?
Was he following me?
What if it was totally innocent and he was just headed home as well, and we just happen to live in the same part of town?
Was I just projecting all sorts of bad intent onto this poor guy?
What if he is a legit creepy stalker?

I didn't want to make a huge to-do out of what could be nothing, but I decided that I needed to tell my coworkers this morning about what had gone down last night. They could decide for themselves if I was being concerned over nothing, but I would feel horrible if he did turn out to be a creep and I hadn't said anything to them to warn them. Better safe than sorry.

We had some storm damage a couple weeks ago, and a few trees had fallen and been broken out by the staff parking lot. Four people from the staff were out there working on removing the tree and debris most of the day today.

Truck Guy showed up at some point. One of the gentlemen out working on the tree removal project just happened to be the same person who had watched Truck Guy on his lunch break last week. He noticed Truck Guy sitting out there for quite while this afternoon, and had heard my story about closing and the drive home last night.

He goes over to Truck Guy and decides to have a chat with him, find out what he's up to. Truck Guy claims he just likes to sit there and watch movies, and he isn't doing anything wrong. My coworker agrees, tells him he can see how it's a nice, quiet spot to watch movies and that he isn't doing anything wrong.

Then he breaks it down for him that he has to understand that it is a little unsettling from the staff's perspective to have him just hanging out in the parking lot for hours on end, especially after closing when it is dark out.

Now, I trust this coworker completely, and I know he would never identify me or anyone to Truck Guy, or give out any personal information. He would never mention that I had told him my paranoia about having potentially been followed last night.

Truck Guy tells my coworker that "I wasn't following her" while pointing directly to my car in the parking lot. And then, to make it very clear to my coworker that he wasn't following me, Truck Guy tells him exactly which street I turned onto on the way home, and that he had taken a different street.

That didn't make me feel any better.

Who the hell remembers what street the car in front of them turned on to like 15 hours earlier if they aren't following them? I can't even tell you the color of the car in front of me on the drive home tonight, much less which street they turned on when we parted ways.

My coworker told him again that it was fine, and no one was saying he followed anyone. He stressed again that he needs to look at it from the staff's point of view. He can sit and watch movies in the parking lot, but maybe not for such an extended period of time. That he should consider not sitting in the parking lot, particularly when the library was closing. Leave a few minutes before that. Truck Guy said he liked to watch the movies later in the evening because it was darker and he could see them better. At which point my coworker once again told him that was fine, but he should understand that if he continues to make the staff uncomfortable then the next step will be calling the police.

I was kind of on edge for the rest of the afternoon.

The coworker who had the chat with the guy left for the day. I'm assuming he told me about their conversation so that I would know that the matter had been addressed with Truck Guy, and that the message had been received.

I was a little worried because now we all know Truck Guy is out there hanging in the parking lot, and what if he's pissed off at me?

So we close today at 5 pm, and thankfully it's still light out. No sign of Truck Guy hanging out in the back staff area of the parking lot. We were all looking for him.

I notice there a still a few cars parked in the lot, and since I'm "in charge" I should probably cruise by to make sure everything looks cool. One of my coworkers waited, and he followed behind me because -- Ta Da! -- there sits Truck Guy, in the front of the parking lot. Hanging out in his vehicle after we are closed.

I just left, with my coworker right behind me.

Clearly the message to stop lurking in the library parking lot after closing was not received.

I don't know what to think about all of this.

Am I being overly paranoid about the whole situation?

If Truck Guy was really just there to watch movies, then shouldn't it have been a hint to leave before closing today? Is it worth staying to watch movies knowing that we might call the cops on you? Did he assume it was okay today because it wasn't dark at closing?

Is he just pushing it to see when he crosses the line and we do call the police?

As another coworker mentioned this afternoon, what is he watching movies on? Mostly we just see him sitting in the parking lot, watching the comings and goings of the people in the parking lot. He's not looking at a phone or any other device. He's checking out dvds from the library. Is he bringing a portable dvd player to watch them on?

Why did he point to my car, and specifically say he wasn't following me, when my coworker had never mentioned anything beyond making the staff uneasy by being in the parking lot for hours?

I don't know. A lot of things about it aren't adding up to me. I don't know if I'm worrying about nothing, or if this guy is a creep who sucks at being stealthy and got busted. But why stay and continue the creeptastic behavior again this evening? Is he just stupid, or angry and trying to prove a point, or just really wants to sit in his truck and watch movies?

Tell me what you think. I need your feedback!

I thought writing this all out would help me sort through it and realize I was being way too dramatic about it all, that he's just a weird dude and it's all a big misunderstanding. It hasn't. I still feel just as unsettled about it as I did before.

Am I being ridiculous, crazy, paranoid about this whole thing?

A Birthday Surprise

My niece, Lili, is 15 years old. Her little brother, Austin, has a birthday coming up. The kids have been up here in New York now visiting their Grandparents and I for the summer. Austin has no idea that my brother is taking them all to a Yankees game in August as a surprise for his birthday before they all head back down to Texas.

Lili is in on the surprise, and she wanted to try to make it extra special. Austin's favorite player is Aaron Judge. We watch all of the Yankees games on tv, and as soon as Lili saw that Judge had been injured she knew that probably meant that Austin wouldn't get to see his favorite player in action when they go to the game. Going to the game will still be a great birthday surprise, and Austin will still be thrilled, but it will be a little less magical without getting to see his favorite player in action.

So Lili took it upon herself to email the Yankees to see if there was any way that Austin could get to meet Aaron Judge, even if he is injured and cannot play. She got an email back (probably a generic response) to call customer service. She called, and the very nice woman at customer service explained that meeting players had to be arranged through their management, but they did not have that information to give out.

Lili wasn't ready to give up just yet. I suggested that she post a picture of Austin in his Little League uniform on Instagram, and put her email in the caption. She didn't want to do that because:

1) Austin would see it and it would ruin the surprise of going to the Yankees game
2) She doesn't want him to find out that she tried to get him to meet Aaron Judge if it doesn't work out.

Not knowing what else to do, I told her I would try posting her letter here and posting a link to it on Twitter. Maybe Aaron Judge or someone at the Yankees would see it that way. Worth a shot, right? Maybe the internet can work some birthday magic of it's own for Austin.

Below is the email that Lili sent to the Yankees. I'm just copying and pasting it here.


Hi my name is Lili, I’m 15 I’m from Corpus Christi, Texas. My little brother Austin is a big Yankees fan, but an even bigger Aaron Judge fan. Two years ago my little brother went to his first Yankees game, which also happened to be  Aaron Judge's first game, and he’s been his biggest fan ever since. He was so excited that after the game he passed out before he even got his food.

His little leauge baseball team back in corpus is called “Laguna Little League Yankees” and he begged to get 99. Like I said he REALLY likes Aaron Judge.

We are here visiting family in New York this summer and as a surprise birthday present my dad is  going to take us to the Yankees game on August 9th. Austin will be 11 on August 11th. He got seats in the Judges chamber and tickets to watch batting practice before the game. This a total surprise and Austin has no idea it”s happening.

As you can probably guess Austin was very concerned when Judge got injured and put on the DL. Austin is concerned that his favorite player won’t be playing for a few weeks, I’m upset because he won’t get to see his favorite player get to play at his surprise birthday game. Would it be possible for Austin to meet Aaron Judge at the game on Thursday August 9th? I didn’t tell anyone, I was just hoping to make his birthday surprise a little bit more amazing. 

Thank you for your consideration, I know Yankees are great with they’re fans.

Sincerely, Liliana Myers