Why I Love Spoiler Alerts

Hey there, Friends.

Do you know what I really love and appreciate? Spoiler Alerts. I know, that's kind of a random thing to be keen on, but I am. Even if it's just a description of a video so you know what's in it and can avoid seeing it if you want.

I know I might be in the minority on this one. I understand that there are a lot of people who are super passionate about things -- an artist, music, a movie, etc. -- and want as much information on it as humanly possible at all times. I get it. You're excited about it and want to share that excitement with other people. You can geek out with like-minded people and have conversations that make it even better. I feel you, I honestly do. I'm the same way about some things quite often.

Here's my deal, and it might make me sound like a cranky old grandma who needs to get with the times and get over herself and realize that it's just the way the world works nowadays.

I don't ever skip to the end of a book or a story. If there's a movie I want to see I try not to have it ruined by seeing the entire plot or the ending posted somewhere online ahead of time. I buy all of the music I want to listen to. I know that there are songs out there in existence that were leaked, but I haven't ever listened to them. If the artist who created them wanted them out there in the public realm they would have shared them. Maybe he/she wasn't happy with it, or it wasn't the final product. I'm sure there are many reasons it didn't get released. Somebody leaking it and posting it all over the place is tantamount to stealing, in my opinion.

To be brief: I want to experience whatever it is the way the artist intended it to be. A lot of time and effort was put into creating whatever type of work it may be, of bringing it into existence. Sharing music before the creator wishes, or giving away an entire plot line before most people have had a chance to see the movie, is a pretty shitty way to express your appreciation and gratitude for all of their work.

The internet makes things more complicated.

I follow very few fan accounts. I try to make sure the ones that I do are legit. Do they tell you what they are posting? Do they give credit to the source of pictures/videos? I can only hope that also means they asked permission to share them, but that might be me being hopefully naive. I'm not cool with people swiping pictures and videos from private accounts. I mainly follow other fans. Normally it's people who somehow found me first, and when I look at their account they seem like good people...as much as that can be judged by anything on the internet. At least they don't seem like a bot or a creepy stalker.

Let's talk about music, specifically. I follow the official accounts -- the band, maybe a few specific band members, etc. I don't follow people's family members, their friends, their significant other. That's just a little too creepy/stalkery to me. Everyone deserves their privacy. I don't follow all of the family members of my friends, so why in the world would it be any of my business what people somehow associated with an artist I like are doing?

Here's the thing about music. I know that the artists must know that once they perform a song live it's going to be out there on the internet getting shared, whether they are ready to release it or not. I get that. The cat's out of the bag, so to speak.

Maybe they encouraged everyone at the show to shoot video and post it. Free publicity and a way to get people more excited about hearing the new music. I've seen it happen, especially with bands that don't have millions or even thousands of followers. Make that social media work in your favor and get some new fans! I've also been to shows where the artist has specifically said no pictures or videos, and security will kick your ass to the curb if they catch you doing so. Most of the time nothing is stated either way and you can do whatever you wish.

So here's my moral quandary, and feel free to tell me I have a stick up my ass and need to chill. After a concert there are always a ton of pictures and videos being posted and shared around. For those of you who actually take the time to label it -- New Song! -- I thank you. I'm probably going to skip watching it. It's not that I'm not curious and dying to hear it, but I'd rather hear it in person myself for the first time or when it is finally released. I don't want to hear it for the first time through a video of dubious quality. Maybe the artist is cool with it, maybe they specifically asked not to have that shit posted, or maybe they have resigned themselves to the fact that it will be online before they ever leave the stage.Whatever the case, I'm going to skip it, and I love that the person posting it took the time to give a warning as to the content.

What annoys the hell out of me are the videos posted with no context whatsoever. Where is this even from? I've already explained I'm not okay with people posting things from private accounts, and I also think you need to give credit to the source. The part that really frosts my buns is when it's new music. I'd prefer not to have the first time I hear something be via a retweet of a repost of an Instagram story made from a video posted god only knows where of a concert held some unspecified place that has been manipulated a bunch of times and has the shittiest audio quality in the world. I don't know what the hell I'm watching at first, and it takes a second to realize it's new music. And yes, I realize it's partially my fault for not turning off autoplay on videos. It doesn't make me want to hear the song more. I'm already curious about it. It does make me wonder how much of it is the craptastic quality of the audio by that point, and how far removed it might be from what it originally sounded like. There comes a point when what is being shared is probably not something the artist would be happy about. I'm not a musician, but I feel pretty sure that no one has the goal of saying, "I hope this video that sounds like absolute shit gets spread all over the place! I totally want people to think my new song sounds like crap before I even release it, or maybe they will think I just can't perform live and decide it's not worth coming to a concert!"

Yeah, this kind of turned into a rant. Sorry, Friends.

I realize there are many more important things going on in the world that deserve attention. I've just seen too many spoilers for too many things in recent days. I've about reached my breaking point. Just know that if you post a spoiler warning or even a brief description of what's coming I appreciate you to no end. Every one of us is different and likes different things. I might not want to see or hear something, but that same thing might make other people giddy with excitement and even more stoked about what's coming. To each their own.

So yes, you are free to tell me I'm cranky for no reason. That I need to accept that anything and everything is up for grabs and to be shared on the internet these days. That everyone has the right to determine for themselves how to navigate through the moral quagmire of what should and shouldn't be posted. You already know how I feel.

Captain America: The Winter Soldier -- AKA I'm Still Watching The Marvel Movies In The Wrong Order

** I feel ridiculous even having to say this, but this obviously is going to contain some spoilers.  If you haven't seen the movie yet and don't want to know even the tiniest of spoilers, don't read this!  You've been warned.  I don't want to hear any complaining. Are we clear?  Good.**

I'm still watching the Marvel movies, and I'm still hopelessly out of order.  I haven't seen the first Captain America yet, but I have seen The Avengers so at least I know that much going in to this movie. (Not for lack of trying -- I've got a request in for the first movie at the library, but apparently everyone else wanted to watch it as well so I'm still waiting.)

My friend, bless her, tried to catch me up on the entire first movie before we saw this one.  Luckily the good folks behind the movie also realized that there were probably going to be a bunch of clueless fools like me watching, so they included some backstory.

First of all, apparently our theater has Dolby Make-You-Vibrate-In-Your-Damn-Seat-From-The-Bass surround sound.  Holy shit!  I felt like I was in the explosions, and that was just in the previews.  Not a spoiler or relevant, I realize.  On to the movie!

Captain America has learned some new ass-kicking skills, folks!  He is much more badass than in The Avengers.  That being said, Cap, when the bad guy on the boat basically double-dog dares you to put away your shield, you do not do it!  And you definitely should not be taking off your mask and throwing it to the side!  I felt like I morphed into Captain America's mother.  "What do you think you are doing?  Put your mask back on right now, young man!"

And Rumlow?  This mother f#*ker drove me nuts the entire movie.  Die already, would you!  He got his ass kicked so many times he should have been in a damn hospital somewhere, not back in the next fight.  Falcon left him -- I'm not going to spoil that much -- but he should be dead.  DEAD!!!  

I'm not sure if they meant the identity of The Winter Soldier to be a Big Reveal.  They dropped a lot of hints in the movie ahead of time.  Even I, hopelessly behind things, figured it out right away.

I really enjoyed the movie.  It was not just about the fighting and action sequences -- which were great, don't get me wrong -- but also the plot about information being power, and how that power is used by those who possess it.

I really was worried for a minute that Captain America was going to die.  It would be my luck to get sucked into a movie universe only to watch one of the main characters get killed in one of the first movies I see.  I had to keep reminding myself that there was another Avengers movie coming soon, so he wasn't going to die.  I wonder if The Falcon will get to come back for that?

I was surprised that Hawk Eye didn't show up in this one.  I kind of thought he and Black Widow had a history, maybe worked together outside of The Avengers.  (I have not read the comics, but it really felt they they had history together that would make it plausible.)

I think maybe I need some sort of a timeline for the Marvel universe movies.  Now that I have seen The Avengers and know that all of these guys can work together when they want, it causes me some issues. Take this movie, for instance.  It's all about information and who has it, S.H.I.E.L.D. is having some problems, and the bad guy has this super-strong metal arm.  How the hell does Tony Stark not know this shit is going down and get involved?  It seems hard to believe he didn't notice this little blip on his radar.  Why the hell didn't anyone call him for help?  Was he busy doing whatever happens in Iron Man 3? (I haven't seen it yet -- don't spoil it!)  

Also, stay after the credits roll, folks!  There is an extra little bit at the end.  And what do they show?  Hydra has  Loki's tesseract-staff thing from The Dark World.  OMG is Loki coming back?  If you have been reading, then you know I got sucked into all of these movies because of Loki.

This next thing is not remotely a spoiler, but something that has been pestering me since I watched the Avengers.  Captain America's hair really bothered me in that movie.  The blond looked bizarre to me.  Maybe it is because I had seen Chris Evans in another movie first with dark hair.  Some people are bothered by action or special effects that don't look great and want to nitpick them apart, some people get annoyed by little things like a California license plate in the movie and it is supposed to be Colorado. I get bothered by hair color that does not look right.  It doesn't always happen -- hell, I thought Orlando Bloom was really blond all through the Lord of the Rings trilogy-- but when it does it just bugs me for the entire movie.   I honestly do not know why, but Captain America's hair drove me nuts in the Avengers.  Scarlett Johansson as a red-head worked.  I went into this movie fully expecting Captain America's hair to irk me, but it didn't.  This time it worked.  Maybe less obviously blond?  I really don't know.  I'm assuming he must be blond in the comics.  (**Edit:  I'm right.  My friend did the research and Captain America is blond in the comics.**) 

In short: go see the movie.  It was really good, and very nicely left a lot of loose ends for further development.

**I never said these were going to be super-important spoilers, filled with deep thoughts.**

In Which I Am Late to The Thor Movies

I should start by explaining that superhero movies are not generally my cup of tea.  I rarely watch them.  I actually fell asleep in the theater during a Batman movie.  I know that lots of people adore the genre.  I think part of my problem is that you already know the major plot line before the movie even starts:  Good Guy is going to meet a villain, he will meet his love interest, the villain will be defeated, and Good Guy will get the girl. Happy ending all around.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with that, and I understand why people would enjoy good conquering evil.  I really do get it -- I have watched the Lord of the Rings trilogy repeatedly.  For some reason it just does not translate to superhero movies for me.  It seems like the superhero wins through brawn, not smarts.

Last evening, after I got home from work, I noticed that Thor (the first one) was on television.  I have had numerous people tell me that I have to watch this movie, I will love it, it is so good, etc and so forth. I haven't read any of the comics, but I have a passing familiarity with Norse mythology, so I decided to give it a go.

I missed the first bit, and Thor was already exiled to Earth when I tuned in.  He definitely had some problems, and presumably there was a villain somewhere, and here comes Natalie Portman as the love interest. The actors are great, but I am not getting why people have been telling me that I have to see this.

And then came Loki.

Well hello there, shape-shifter, trickster God!  Now the movie has my attention, and I might just be rooting for the "bad guy".  He's smart, witty, and  you never really know which side his loyalty is going to lie with at any given time.  I'm intrigued.  Maybe I was overly tired, maybe my brain just makes odd connections between things, but Loki made me think of The Prince by Machiavelli. (To think that people told me my degree in English was pointless.  Look at the wonderful use I put it to in my own head!)

I was hooked by the end of the movie.  Odin was awake, Thor had saved the day but lost the girl, and Loki fell into space.  I was not best pleased by that last part, as Loki had quickly become my favorite character.  Hang on -- didn't another movie just come out last year?  Bless you, Verizon Fios, for having Thor: The Dark World available On Demand!  I had to watch it.  Immediately.

**You might want to skip this next section if you have not watched Thor: The Dark World yet.  There are going to be some spoilers.  Just scroll down the page until you see more red text.  Or go watch the movie now.  This will still be here when you are finished.**

First off -- the Dark Elves are just creepy.  I don't like their faces.  They are nightmare fodder.

Secondly, why is Loki in jail?   Last I saw he fell out of Asgard.  He was naughty and caused some problems, apparently.  I'm not sure why locking him up in solitary confinement was the solution, as that is just going to tick him off even more.  Mistake, good guys, mistake.  That's a lot of free time for him to think, and thinking is his strong point, not yours.

Let's jump ahead to the part where I almost turned off the movie, shall we?

Did Loki just die?  Unacceptable!  There had best be some illusions going on right here.  And Thor -- really?  You're going to leave your dead brother who just saved your life lying on the ground?  Your Mom just got a fire boat, and lights, and became a star.  You just left Loki dead on the ground and promised to tell your Dad that he had died nobly?  I'm disappointed in you, Thor.

Of course I could not stop watching at that point.  I'm invested in defeating the creepy Dark Elves now.  So let's just skip to the end.  Thor goes to have a chat with Odin.  Odin wants him to be King.  Thor is all, "I don't want to be King.  It's too hard and you have to make tough decisions.  Loki would have been better at it.  BTW -- he died nobly."  Thor leaves, and OMG Odin is really Loki!  I cheered, by myself, in the middle of the night.  I'm a tad concerned about what might have happened to Odin, but Loki isn't dead!

Somebody start working on a third movie, please!

**You can start reading again below this point.  No more spoilers from here.  Just don't look up the page or you will ruin it for yourself.**

So today I did the Heart Walk, and the friend I was walking with happens to be a big fan of all of the superhero movies.  I told her that I had finally gotten around to watching Thor, but that I had preferred Loki to the good guys.  Her response?  "Oh, I'm so glad you discovered Loki!  I knew you would love him! *pause* Not that you are evil or anything, but he seems like your type of character."  Yes, yes he is. We went on to discuss the movie, and I explained how I immediately had to watch the second movie, and how distressing I had found parts of it.

She asked if I had seen The Avengers.  No, obviously I had not.  That is about multiple superheroes, so why would I ever have watched that?  I had looked up the movies on IMDB last night, so I knew Thor and Loki were listed as being in The Avengers, but I assumed that with all of those superheroes crammed into one movie the main focus would be on all of them, and Loki must just be a tiny part.

I was informed that my assumption was incredibly wrong.  Turns out that Loki is a big part of that movie, as he is the villain that all of the superheroes are fighting.  Who knew?  It actually explains quite a bit of context that I missed in the second movie, like the whole "This is for New York" face-slap.  I did think it was a bit odd that they kept referencing all of this chaos that Loki had caused, yet they weren't showing any of it.  Apparently it rates its own movie, which I now have to watch.  (I'm not counting the face-slap as a spoiler -- even I had seen that in the trailers.)

What have I gotten myself into with these movies?  I did not realize that Loki was going to suck me into an entire franchise.