Saturday, October 8, 2016

Avocados? Really?

Hey, Friends.

Did you ever find yourself ripped out of what seemed to be a very nice dream by the obnoxious beeping of your alarm clock?  That's how I started my day yesterday.  Now, before your minds go straight to the gutter, it wasn't that type of nice dream.  It was more that I woke up feeling relaxed and as if all was right in my little corner of the world, and just a tiny bit pissed off with my alarm for waking me up.

I'm sure you don't recall, but as we previously covered in my weird licorice dream, I don't normally remember anything about my dreams, so when I do it is super exciting to me.  Buckle in, kids, while we take a little wander through my dream.  It'll be like a group project where we all interpret the strange realms of my sleeping brain.  What -- that doesn't sound like a fun time to you?  Feel free to go find your own fun in a place that is elsewhere.

Okay, Friends:  to be fair, I only remember the tiniest smidgen of the dream from right before the alarm went off.  We don't have a whole lot of material to work with, is my point.  Although, oddly, it does involve food once again.

Begin dream sequence....if this was a movie, there would be special effects here.....

I was in a kitchen -- a very nice kitchen which clearly was not my own.  There was a big, white island in the middle of the kitchen.  Think of the way kitchens look on HGTV  if you need a mental image.  I was standing at the island with a guy that, in my dream, I apparently was friends with although I couldn't see his face.  His face was all blurry, like when they try to disguise someone's identity on a tv show.  I could tell he had dark hair, and was taller than me. We were both wearing black v-neck t-shirts, and I could see up as far as his neck before the blurriness started.  Made perfect sense to have matching outfits in the dream.

What were we doing at the kitchen island?  Cutting up avocados to make guacamole, and giving each other a hard time about doing it the wrong way.  That quickly turned into a friendly disagreement about who had the best -- and therefore correct -- way to make guacamole.  These weren't serious arguments.  We were joking around and teasing each other.  The very last thing I remember before my alarm went off was thinking he was about to playfully smoosh avocado on the end of my nose for some comment I had made about his guacamole-making skills, or lack thereof.

Fade back to reality as dream sequence ends....

Yeah.  I told you I didn't remember very much about it.

My first thought, after being slightly pissed off at my alarm clock, was that I was still in a pretty good mood.  I was highly amused by the antics I could remember from my dream.  As I dragged myself from bed and started to assemble the all-important coffee, I decided I would have to Google some things when I was a little more with it.  Even to my pre-coffee brain that seemed like an odd dream to have because:

1) I have never actually been in a kitchen that looked like the one in my dream. I should maybe not watch HGTV right before going to bed.

2) Avocados?  Guacamole?  Where the hell was I pulling such random choices from?  I love avocados, don't get me wrong, but I've literally made guacamole maybe twice in my life. I had to use a recipe both times.  I normally buy that shit at the store.  I was also unaware that I had opinions on guacamole and how best to process an avocado.

3) I'm cooking in my dreams.  I'm not a terribly good cook when I'm awake.  Oh, I love to bake, but cooking actual meals is not my strong point.

Before I had a chance to Google anything, I was chatting to a friend about my weird avocado-guacamole dream.  She had some thoughts, but not a great deal of insight to offer.  We'll cover those first.

--Maybe I was just really craving avocados, or have some sort of vitamin deficiency that my body wants me to fill.  Maybe, but that's not a fun answer.

--Who was the guy?  You should find him!  I don't know, and it would be terribly hard to find someone whose face was blurred out.  If you can figure out how to do that Friends, let me know!

--I should Google the significance of black, since we were both wearing it in the dream.  It was probably a bad omen, like something horrible is going to happen in a kitchen.  No.  Just, no.  I happen to love the color black, which she knows.  (Followed closely by green, for those interested.)  It's elegant, simple, and a tad mysterious.  It's also incredibly practical as black matches everything.  A large portion of my wardrobe consists of black clothing.  In fact, I'm pretty sure that the shirt I was wearing in my dream was the same one that I had worn to work on Thursday.  Sorry Friends.I'm just going with the fact that I love the color black, not doing research on it.

Maybe it really was something as simple as me craving avocado, or wanting to make guacamole.  I don't know.  I decided to hit up Google anyway since it seemed pretty random.  I decided to start with the part I thought would be more likely to have a result -- that I was cooking in my dream.

Cooking, as it turns out, is a pretty good thing to dream about.  I checked a few different places to compare the answers. (Why yes, I am kind of a nerd!)  To try and keep it brief, it can symbolize creativity.  It can also mean new opportunities, security, or wanting to make people happy.  Works for me!  If you've had a dream about cooking yourself, or are just really interested in this, this page pretty much covers it all.

Now, moving on to the avocado part of it.  This is where it gets a little interesting, Friends.

I honestly kind of expected Google to give me results that politely told me that I was being stupid and wasting my time. I clicked on the first link expecting to see a page that said something like, "Seeing an avocado in your dream symbolizes nothing.  It's a fucking avocado.  Go buy one at the store and get over it."

Yeah.  That's not even remotely what I got.  Apparently avocados can mean a lot or things.  Who knew?

"To see or eat an avocado in your dream symbolizes lust, sexuality, fertility, potential, and continuity of life. Alternatively, an avocado symbolizes richness and indulgence."

"Avocado is one of the essential ingredients for a healthier skin. Thus, sometimes these dreams give us signs about our health conditions. For instance, to see a fresh thick avocado in dream means that you will enjoy good health. Fruits, especially avocado also relate our sexual desires. Avocados are also a source of energy and thus to see a fresh avocado in dream is a sign of positive energy. A ripened avocado in leaves is also a very good sign. It indicates prosperity and good luck. Feel happy about this dream as there is some good news around. "

WTF.  So, apparently I want to jump Mr. Blurry Face With the Dark Hair.  And here I didn't think it was that kind of a dream.  Moving right along...

The next website just generally confused the hell out of me.  Apparently the avocados could mean that: I felt great, felt secure, no worries, lots of people that support me, and I'm not jealous.  However, it could also mean that I'm abusing all of the people who support and love me, that I have enemies who I am being too nice to and will use that fact against me, and that I am jealous and want to destroy people.  I'm not even going to link to it because it was a hot mess.

This last one might be my favorite because it is short, sweet, and to the point.

"Relates to harmony and peace."
From: this page.

I weeded out a lot of flotsam there, Friends.  Total shit websites that try to hijack your browser, or have a shit-ton of pop-up ads.  Then there was the totally inapplicable meanings like, "A proposal is on the way!" Yeah.  Seeing as I'm single I don't think that is terribly likely. I think my favorite bit of silliness was that it could symbolize the 1970s because avocado was a popular color during that time period.

Alrighty.  So maybe Mr. Blurry Face With the Dark Hair has some answers.  Let's Google that shit.

Unsurprisingly, the most popular answer is that it is someone I don't know.  Second most popular is that it really is someone I know, and I should not trust him.  My subconscious is trying to tell me I am being deceived.  Heartwarming.

What have we learned today, Friends?  Beyond the fact that I have odd dreams, I mean.

1) Avocados are way more sexually charged than I ever gave them credit for.

2) I think I'm going to be relaxed, really creative, and lucky?  I'm trying to combine the cooking and avocados on that one.

3) Someone I know could be trying to deceive me, oh happy day.

For what it's worth, I take none of this seriously.  Everyone can interpret things the way they want.

Personally, I'm going to choose the good vibes and hope it means that I am going to meet Mr. Blurry Face With the Dark Hair, who apparently also likes the color black.  We are going to make sexually-charged guacamole, and it will be awesome!

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