But Can You Do It With Frosted Flakes Instead?

Hey, Friends.

Long time, no talk.

Sorry about that.  My niece and nephew are up visiting from Texas, so I've been spending as much time as possible hanging with the kidlets when I'm not at work. They win over you, Friends.

To make it up to you for the almost month-long silence, allow me to share this evening's attempt at a culinary creation.  It may end up being a total disaster. Doesn't that sound like fun?

I feel the need to explain that I am, generally, pretty damn good at baking and making desserts. Ridiculous amount of steps?  No problem.  High percentage that it could all go horribly wrong?  I love a challenge.  Going to require getting every pan I own dirty?  Okay -- that I'm not keen on, but I'll do it.


For no good reason, Rice Krispies Treats are like my kryptonite.

Picture from Rice Krispies recipe, which can be found here:  Original Treats

The commercials show children happily and easily making them with their families:

That's not remotely what happens when I try to make them.

The first time I tried to make Rice Krispies Treats it went very, very wrong.  You know what smells horribly nasty? Burnt marshmallows.  Also a bitch to get off of your pans.  

Some marshmallow tips from me to you:

1) Never use the giant "campfire" size marshmallows, even if they are the only option in the store.  I don't care how many different stores you have to go to, keep searching for any size that is smaller. Trust me on this one.  Learn from my misadventures in the world of marshmallows.

2) You want to try using fun, colorful marshmallows?  Be prepared for them to come out looking slightly grayish.  All of those fun colors are going to melt into one big, grayish pile of goo, not pretty swirls.

3) I know the official recipe says to use mini-marshmallows.  Maybe you can handle that.  I cannot.  That stuff will turn on you and start burning in the blink of an eye. You need to be vigilant in your marshmallow cookery.

4) I just use the normal size marshmallows.  No one will know once they are melted into ooey-gooey congealed goodness.

And for the record:  I have never tried the microwave route. My track record with marshmallows is bad enough that I'm not about to introduce them to my microwave. I have visions of them exploding all over the place, or expanding and oozing everywhere.  

Marshmallow woes aside, I can pull it off and successfully make them.  

Fruity Pebbles Treats

I have a process, now that I have screwed it up badly  made all of the mistakes  done it enough times to find all of my problem areas.  I don't know that the good people of Rice Krispies would be too thrilled with it, but it gets the job done.

How To Make Rice Krispies Treats: The Tammy Method

1) Get out your butter-flavored cooking spray and coat a 13x9 pan to within an inch of its life.

2) Get out your wok.  It's got a nice wide top for pouring in marshmallows without spilling them all over the place.

3) Put your box of Rice Krispies (or other fine cereal of choice) by the back door.  No, I'm not kidding. Make sure it is opened and ready to go!

4) Put the butter in the wok and melt it over low heat.

5) When the butter is melted, dump in your entire bag of normal sized marshmallows.

6) Stir constantly and avoid all distractions while stressing out and trying not to burn it.

7) When the marshmallows are nice and smooth and melty, turn off the stove.

8) Take your wok of marshmallow madness, your spoon, and your box of cereal and go stand in the driveway.

9) While holding the wok in your left hand, dump the cereal in using your right hand.

10) Drop the empty box on the ground by your feet and start trying to mix it all together before the marshmallow goo starts to firm up.

11) Pay no attention to the cereal flying out of the wok while you stir.  This is why you are doing it outside.  The birds and other neighborhood wildlife can enjoy a tasty snack later.

12) When it looks as mixed as you can get it, hurry back inside and put it into the pan.  Press that stuff in firmly so that the bars will (hopefully) hold together when you try to cut them up later.

13) Cover with waxed paper and hope for the best.

14) Go back outside to get the empty box and throw it in the garbage.

That's really my process, Friends.  I am apparently incapable of stirring in the cereal without making a gigantic mess.  I like to think of it as an urban campfire scenario.  A brief intermission en plein air.

Why are we discussing this, Friends?

Well, I have my book group tomorrow night.  We will be discussing One More Thing by B. J. Novak. In the book is a story called "Kellogg's".  As you might have guessed, it mentions cereal.

You probably remember that I like to serve refreshments that go with the theme of the book at my book groups.  (Don't remember, or you are a new reader and are dying of curiosity? You can click here or just click on the "book group" tag.)  Well, this particular chapter mentions Frosted Flakes and Corn Flakes.  What am I supposed to do with that?  I'm not going to serve my book group bowls of cereal. You're killing me here, Mr. Novak!

And then I had an epiphany: I could make Rice Krispies Treats, but use Frosted Flakes instead!  My euphoria was short lived.  After my initial rush of giddiness subsided,  my brain had a lot of questions as to what I thought I was going to do.

• What the hell would you even call them?  Frosted Flakes Treats?  Frosted Flakes Bars?
• Is this even a thing?  You cannot be the first person to ever have this idea.  There is probably a good reason you don't see commercials for Frosted Flakes Treats.
• Will these things even hold together?  Rice Krispies are small and easily coated.  Frosted Flakes are a lot bigger with more surface area.
• You should probably Google this before trying it.

You're right, brain.  I could Google it.  I probably should....just to avoid a potential disaster.  It would be the smart thing to do.  You raised some valid points.

Yeah, I totally didn't bother to look it up.  It will be our own little culinary adventure, Friends!

So, just a few minutes ago, I mixed up the Frosted Flakes treats-bars-things

Why yes, those would be Frosted Flakes in my driveway.  I wasn't lying about that step.

and I have now squooshed (technical term) them into the pan.

Voila!

As I write this they should be firming up into a nice solid block.  Cross your fingers and send me good vibes.  I'm not even going to attempt to cut these bad boys until tomorrow.  I promise I will fill you in on the outcome -- for good or for ill.  

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go make carrot cake for my book group.  

There's a Hole in the Wall

Hey Friends.

Let's start with the boring back story first, shall we?  Fantastic.

We had to move a fire extinguisher at work yesterday.  It was built into the wall in the Children's area near the activity wall.  Even though it was in a case with a lock on it, we couldn't actually keep it locked. If a fire were to break out it would be silly to have to find the key to be able to put it out. Needless to say, little patrons with small fingers found it intensely interesting.  Obviously, it had to be moved.

I knew maintenance had been doing some work over there, but since it is all the way across the building I hadn't really been paying attention to it.  It wasn't until a coworker told me it looked we cut a hole in the wall, changed our minds, and then patched it up that I wondered what the heck was going on.  Another coworker then explained what had happened.

Being a curious person, I had to see what exactly they were talking about.  This is what I found:

Very attractive.  Not noticeable at all.

We started discussing that we were really missing an opportunity to get creative by just patching it up and making it a boring old wall again.  Someone said we should have a Library Elf who lived in there, and we could make it his little house.  Another person said we should make it a cabinet of interesting things for little kids to play with or touch.  Both very sweet ideas which will never happen.  I took it in a different direction.

**Friends:  I feel the need to explain here that none of my following suggestions are to be taken seriously.  They are jokes.  Maybe not funny if you don't work in a library, but they are jokes. People misinterpret shit all of the time on the internet, so before anyone starts freaking out about child endangerment or the likes let me be very clear:  NOT SERIOUS.  JOKING!  I WOULD NEVER HURT OR ENDANGER A CHILD IN ANY WAY.  We clear?  Excellent.**

I thought they were missing an excellent opportunity for a way to control story time behavior. It could be a teaching tool.  Just think of the possibilities!

Idea #1:  For the child who cannot control their frustration/anger

"Jimmy.  Jimmy!  You cannot hit other children during story time!  That's it, young man.  Now you have to sit in the hole in the wall for the rest of story time and think about what you've done."

Idea #2:  To encourage parent participation

"I don't know, Jane.  I don't think your Mommy was really singing along today.  I'm pretty sure she was just lip-synching.  Sorry, kiddo.  Looks like you have to go in the hole.  Maybe Mommy will learn how to participate better by next week."

Idea #3:  For the over-zealous participants

"Bobby!  This is Toot & Scoot, not a demolition derby!  Smash into one more kid on purpose and it's off to the hole with you."

It would work for the older kids as well.  It might be a tight fit, but I think it would still be doable.

Idea #4:  For the kids who like to push the boundaries

"Look, Elena.  I know you know the rules about using the computers, but you choose to keep trying to skirt around them to stay on longer.  Keep it up and you're going in the wall.  You think Harry Potter had it rough?  His cupboard under the stairs was freaking cozy compared to what you'll find in the hole."

The beauty part is you wouldn't even have to do any of them -- just the threat should be enough to deter any problems.  Make that hole in the wall look creepy as hell and no one will ever want to be sent there.

Idea #5:  On a less traumatizing note, it could be made into a game.

Put a little door knob on it.  Every few days you switch what is behind the door when you open it:  it could be a picture, a toy, a book -- anything that would fit inside.  You make up a little bingo card and each square has an item that could potentially be behind the door.  The kids can pick up a card, and every time they come to the library they have to check what is behind the door.  They get a staff member to initial the correct square verifying that they really checked the door on the proper day. (There are a lot of cheaters out there.  Trust me.)  When they get a Bingo they get a prize.  Like a reward for coming to the library regularly.

What?  I'm full of all kinds of ideas, Friends.  I'm not an evil person.  My sense of humor just skews toward the dark side at times.  It was a long week.

It's all highly irrelevant, however.  Soon it will just be a boring yellow wall once again, although it did make that last hour of the work week a lot more amusing.  

Note:  None of the names used in the examples are actual specific patrons.  They just popped into my head as random names to use.